While the world is mourning death o f children, thousands of them, I am reminded of Yahya in each one of them. 3rd June 2022 we were blessed with him but not in the way that normally people do. It was unexpected and certainly un-welcomed. An emergency that changed everything onwards for us. It wasn’t in the broad daylight. As if the dark layers of that night were mourning with us what was about to happen. “You are going to be operated”, the doctor on duty said. “But how could I it is too early”, I responded. Clueless about what’s going on and what just happened I had to submit to what the experts said. They took my samples, prepped me for the unpredictable journey .I just followed the instructions like someone lost in the woods. At 11:30 P.M a baby was born. His tiny little feet facing me was his first glimpse. He was alive, miraculously. Miracles do happen isn’t it? I thanked Allah, chokingly.
But he was taken away, rushed to NICU and I left the theatre with empty hands. There was no celebration. No distribution of sweets. I found my old parents standing by my side, feeble and weak in this age and my husband and siblings rushing to NICU. There and then we bifurcated in our roles some staying with me and others waiting for Yahya to recover.
Do you know how does it feel? Delivering a child but not having him in your arms? Well, I didn’t know that before Yahya was born. I thought pregnancy is all about a 9 month long journey that culminates with the birth of a baby, and distribution of sweets. As simple as that. That day I realized it is a blessing of Allah and fortunate are those who are blessed with a healthy child (Be it a boy or girl, that is even out of question).
Coming back to Yahya. Only Allah (SWT) knows what happened to him inside NICU. We weren’t allowed for obvious reasons of safety and security of little angels striving for existence. His Lord was taking care of him. On fifth day for his life he was diagnosed with staphylococcus bacteria in his samples. He was all bloated. Doctors said he won’t survive. But he did. Then he was diagnosed with meningitis (an infection that transmitted to his brain). Usually such patients have least life expectancy. Doctors said he won’t survive. But he did. He had transmitted hospital acquired infection. (A very alarming concern of our times).
Chinmayi Balusu quotes in his peer reviewed article on “Addressing the prevalence of Healthcare-Associated Infections in India”, that HCAI can vary between 4.4 to 83.09 percent across different hospitals in India, which is considerably higher than other wealthy countries. These HCAIs can cause a financial cost of up to Rs 2, 23,155.81 (2,932.81 USD$) per day, long term disability and resistance to antimicrobial and antibiotics in the years after their sickness. The main cause of these HCAI transmission he refers to poor sanitation practices adopted in our health care institutions.
Having said that, coming back to Yahya. On 15th day of his birth he was finally discharged from NICU. You know what that superficially means? That he survived, he battled through his challenging phase of life. He was shifted to pediatric ward. I having no bounds to my happiness rushed to the hospital to hold him in my arms for the first time. I surprisingly didn’t cry, had no tears but just a sigh of relief and I greeted him. Assalamualaikum Yahya! From there began our journey together. For next more months to go.
My joy faded when I saw doctors deliberating on his case in gruesome ways. I would just read their faces. Listen to their technical terminologies. New words like meningistis, ventriculitis banged my ears. Had never heard of them before. Here the naive me was getting introduced to the other side of the normal life that we so are ungrateful for.
Doctors in their medically transparent words that would ethically sound quite brutal, brief me about the challenges this disease will come up with. Loss of sight, Loss of hearing, paralyses in nearby future. Can you imagine what would had those words done to me? Yes, I was devastated. I was broken. I was in need of help from doctors, from skies to treat my child.
One day on one such round of doctors I broke down and asked them, chocking, Is there 1% percent hope of normalcy? I remember the words of Dr. Javaid. Yes Mam Miracles do happen.
Through Yahya Allah introduced me to the unseen realm .The realm of miracles. The true meaning of hope I discovered for the first time in life, where all the doors were slammed on me. And I turned to one door of our creator with hope and perseverance.
After that Yahya underwent multiple surgical procedures with severe most and stubborn infections. We moved from one hospital to another in pursuit of his best treatment. Luckily he could see, he could hear, he could eat, drink. Most importantly he would smile. He was the most smiling child I had ever seen. Doctors, medics everyone fell in love with him. He was absolutely contrary to what medical science says where there is 98 % mortality rate for such patients. He survived. And so did the hope in me. For me he was the Musa that Allah (SWT) would return me to with all his health. The Yousuf who would unite with his beloved father after long gloomy years of pain.
His medical condition had affected his milestones. Had to undergo various physiotherapy sessions to do what others normally do (How ungrateful and callous we are towards the blessings of our Lord). The entire medical team couldn’t come closer to the normal functioning of Human body and here we speak about recreating artificial humans and cloning.
Yahya’s battle for life ended on 6th September 2023 at 15th month of his age. Allah (SWT) allowed us to learn pristine lessons of life through him. All through this I loved him, caressed him, talked my heart out to him, encouraged him to stay strong (I am sure he was listening and understanding what I was telling him), reciting duas, Listening to Qur’an. (Surah Rahman was his favourite). And all this time I saw him smilling. He passed away while I was reciting his favourite surah to him.
I am grateful to Allah (SWT) for honoring me with the birth of Yahya. He was truly a miracle from Allah (SWT). May you be among the ‘saabireen’ in the company of Prophets and righteous, my love.
Ameen!
(Author is working as Assistant Professor Islamic Studies, Higher Education Department J&K)
