Marriage is one of the most sacred and celebrated events in human life. It marks the union of two individuals, two families, and the beginning of a new chapter. In our culture, it is considered a moment of great joy, honour, and blessings. But today, an unfortunate reality overshadows this sacred institution: we have made marriage so expensive and showy that it has become a burden, especially for the poor and middle-class families.
What was once a simple ritual, filled with heartfelt emotions, has now turned into a grand display of wealth, power, and status. It is no longer about the couple starting a life together , it has become about how much money is spent, how lavish the venue is, how rich the gifts are, and how long the guest list is.
This trend has become toxic and deeply unfair. In the race to “keep up with society,” many families , especially those with limited income , are being pushed into debt. A daily wager, a small farmer, a clerk, or a single mother may spend their lifetime savings on a single wedding. Often, they are forced to sell land, jewellery, or borrow large sums of money just to meet the societal expectations of a “standard wedding.”
And still, if they conduct a simple marriage, they are mocked or judged. Whispers float around: “They must be poor”, “They didn’t even arrange a proper function”, “The girl went empty-handed.” Why have we allowed such cruelty and insensitivity to become normal?
Even more concerning is that some people, despite knowing their limits, fall into the trap of showing off. To outshine others, they stretch beyond their means booking expensive halls, calling musicians, printing fancy invitations, hiring photographers, decorating cars, and preparing multi-course meals. In doing so, they fall into huge debts, which they struggle to repay for years. The purpose is not always love for the couple – but fear of judgment, pressure to impress, or blind competition.
The worst victims of this culture are poor daughters. In many cases, young women remain unmarried simply because their parents cannot afford a lavish wedding or cannot fulfil dowry expectations. The pain of such families is silent but deep. A daughter watches her dreams fade as her parents struggle under pressure. Isn’t it heartbreaking that in the name of marriage, we are killing the dignity and peace of families?
It’s time for serious reflection. What kind of society are we becoming where appearances matter more than values? Where marriage is judged not by love or commitment, but by how grand the stage looks or how rich the food tastes?
Let us not forget: a costly wedding does not guarantee a happy marriage. And a simple wedding does not mean a poor life. True happiness lies in understanding, in mutual respect, in companionship not in chandeliers, not in flower arrangements.
A call to society:
We must rise above this toxic culture. Let me be clear: I am not against those who can afford grand weddings. It is their choice and right to celebrate the way they wish. But society must not mock, belittle, or look down upon those who choose simplicity or cannot afford extravagance. We all have different lives and different struggles. Let us stop judging and start respecting. We need to change ourselves first if we want a more compassionate and balanced society.
Let’s revive the spirit of simplicity, dignity, and inclusiveness. Here are a few humble suggestions:
– Keep weddings simple. Focus on what truly matters the union of two people, not two bank balances.
– Do not mock simple weddings. Respect those who show courage and do not follow societal pressure.
– Promote mass/community marriages. This can ease costs, reduce stress, and build social solidarity.
– Teach our children early on that love is not about money, and dignity is not about display.
Remember, the wealthiest wedding is one where hearts are rich in love and minds are at peace.
In the end, ask yourself will people remember the gold that was worn, or the goodness that was shown? Will they talk about the wedding stage, or the strength of the bond?
Let’s stop turning marriage into a stage for showing off. Let’s make it again what it was meant to be a sacred, humble, and joyous beginning to a shared life.
Let love be loud, not the music. Let blessings be plenty, not the dishes. Let dignity shine, not diamonds.
That’s the kind of culture our society needs one where even the poor can marry their daughters with pride, and without fear.
