Despite observing the “International Women’s Day” (IWD) every year on March 08, violence and abuse with respect to women rarely gets due attention of policymakers and other stakeholders. The general tendency is to blame women for every wrong in society. This virtually absolves the perpetrators committing heinous crimes against women in or outside homes. Meanwhile, the success of the IWD hinges on the progress of women in a society. The IWD calls on governments, civil society organizations and human rights activists of the world to make efforts to check violence against women in all societies.
Notably violence and discrimination in J&K against women has become a routine everywhere– home, vehicles, public places and work places. Though some measures are in place to bar the violence and even some organizations are working to prevent the barbarism, the bitter pill to swallow is that women here continue to suffer in the absence of any robust monitoring system and legal mechanism that could deter the perpetrators.
About women, we have stereotypes like they are “Kum akal” (less intelligent) and “zanan kathe”( women talks). Men use these stereotypes even in the presence of women. This is verbal abuse of female gender. Some fathers-in-law use foul language against a daughter-in-law and disinherit her husband for defending her honour and life. Thousands of such cases are at police stations and courts.
Girls are abducted and raped. A woman is burnt alive by her in-laws. Another woman is hanged on one or the other excuse. Beating or killing for dowry is not uncommon in this society and wife beating is almost a routine.
The National Crime Records Bureau data reveals that there were 500 instances of cruelty by husbands and their relatives towards women in J&K. Srinagar topped with 70 such cases, followed by Jammu with 60, Rajouri 58, Kupwara 38, Poonch 25, Doda 49, seven each from Anantnag and Awantipora, 11 each from Bandipora, Handwara, and Ramban, 24 from Baramulla, 17 from Budgam, 23 from Ganderbal, 13 from Kathua, and six from Kishtwar.
Girls are mostly educated at government schools while boys at private schools. Boys are provided better food and other items while girls are denied. Why? Because of the prevailing ‘boy superior attitude’. Take the roll statements from government schools, nine out of ten students are girls. As per the recent-most GoI survey, National Family Health Survey 4 (NFHS 4), only 37.2 percent women (in the age between to 49 years) have attended school for 10 or more years.
Further, once a girl is married, she is subjected to abuse at in-laws. Many women are thrown out of the house along with their husbands and are forced to either live in rented houses or return to their parental homes. Their husbands are denied the property share for years together. This has become a culture now. Thousands of married girls and their husbands are living in miserable conditions because of this culture. Since such cases have wide social sanction, the couples either suffer silently.
Actually, once married, a girl is expected, by her in -laws, to work tirelessly and silently. Her choices, likes, dislikes and wishes are given no importance. Every one begins to dictate terms to her. Those women who toe the line, suffer in silence while those who do not are either thrown out of the house or put to abuse or even death.
Then, there are political, social and economic inequalities that women find very difficult to remove. There is discrimination at work places, lack of opportunities in social, religious and political organizations. The employed women are considered unfit and weaker for tasks such as census, election duty and any other survey. As per records of the government departments, Public Sector Undertakings, and Universities, in JK, just 8.2 percent of the working personnel are female.
And then we come to the rigid interpretation of religious laws that keep women subordinate to men who abuse them mentally, socially, economically and even physically. There are women with no knowledge about their religious rights or about the codal norms. Most women fear to report abuse or ask for their rights. Many men violate religious teachings and under the influence of traditions, they control all aspects of a woman.
To end violence against women, we need to understand religious laws and legal rights of a woman properly so that the violators can be punished. Absolute male dominance should stop. New laws and gender policies be applied effectively and efficiently to end the gender violence. We also need a change in attitudes and behavior that tolerate violence against women. Men are not taught to respect women. Our schools just translate subjects and pass on vague knowledge to students. Right from schools, boys can be taught to respect girls because schools basically are meant to teach the live and let live principle.
Moreover, teaching is not what you translate from books to pupils; teaching in fact is what pupils learn from you and from books. Educational institutions should enable students to see what proper behavior towards women is. Religious institutions and media can well educate people to prevent violence against women.
Government can launch a campaign to educate people not to violate women’s rights at home or outside it. It can take strict action against the violators. It can pass a law that denial of property rights is a punishable offence. There is nothing unlawful or immoral if a woman decides to live with her husband, not in a joint family. But a revenge is taken of the couple for separating from the joint family setup. Denial of property and home and depriving of respectful life are the major instruments used to traumatize the couple.
Let’s treat women as human beings and let them live a dignified and happy life. That will be the real observation of the International Women’s Day. Anything less amounts to lip service, leaving women at a disadvantage.
(Author is RK Columnist and teacher by profession. Feedback: [email protected])
