The toolkits of culture, family and society evolve our cognitive corollary we grow up with. Most of us are not 'we' but anyone or everyone. We read others, watch others, emulate others, grasp others and finally become others with no or little consciousness. We become, good or bad, sharp or dull. Only some of us are self influenced and self grown and operate with little awareness we track of our own. So we opt to live as a self which is actually without self or a grafted self.
We don't learn to gauge life deeply. If we do we will find that we are not one "self" but so many "selves" with a separate set of peculiarities of each self living in one physical cage. There is one "self" that makes you strong and another "one" that brings you to the mat.
We need to learn the art of separation within and divide and dump the thoughts and attitudes of negativity to stop them from riding over the real self. Destructive, demolishing and derailed self inflict our life forces just to make them idle. Some part of a "self” in us is our good friend and some our dangerous enemy. It requires serious efforts of identification to de-identify with the self which is filled with negative pulls and pushes. It is molecular in shape not so visible to catch easily.
If we roam with free radicals of negative thoughts and emotions emerging from multiple selves and unconsciously accept them to be our real self, it will drop us in prison without any feeling of imprisonment. In such a state of mind and soul, thoughts or emotions that pass through us are not ours. The movements of thought and thinking patterns wondering in our own mental landscape actually don't belong to us but others. Here, if we can't learn the opt and drop techniques, we will not be able to liberate ourselves from the cell, walled by others. However, significant others with visible influence are always beneficial.
We allow impulses that originate from the borrowed negative self to overtake our entire life. We seldom explore to learn wisdom through our own self to gift our life with peace, patience and prosperity without paying for it. We again allow the influences of darkness, created by so many others, impact our life to make it deliberately complex and hard at personal, family and social fronts. We rarely find soulful energies to shine us, to strengthen us and to make us calm in toxic situations.
We should affiliate with live humanity, not the humanity lying in coma. This will enable us to be contended even with ordinary things in an extraordinary way for which most of us are in chaos and conflict, actually unnecessarily. A new self will be finding its way through various other selves to dominate with new world view and understanding. This will give wings to our soul to fly. The prison will break. Others will take a leave.
We would realize our own self and we will live independently to make an outstanding contribution as an altruistic being. All disturbing and forced bondages, in and around, would also vanish and so many shadow castles would be demolished mostly raised over the fear and unwise standards of others throughout. Such a self will no longer be governed by the crude ideas, weird thinking patterns, painful, unwanted and inflicting practices of others. The mind gets trained to think itself and becomes enough mature, collaborating with self to receive the ideas, ideals, orders and offers from the people around only after thorough filtration. Let's find the self.
(The author is a regular columnist of Rising Kashmir and can be reached at firstname.lastname@example.org)