Domestic violence is widely prevalent but remains invisible in the public domain, with women being subjected to cruelty by their husbands or in-laws in various ways
SHEIKH SHABIR KULGAMI
Nations achieve greatness when they accord due respect to women; conversely, those that fail to do so have neither been great nor will they ascend to greatness, as aptly observed by Swami Vivekananda. It may be hard to believe that in a recent incident in my area, a young mother was thrown out of her one-storey house along with her husband and two small children. This is just the tip of the iceberg, as atrocities — physical and mental– are committed with impunity against women, particularly daughters-in-law, who are soft targets and silent victims.
According to the National Crime Records Bureau (NCRB) data, 3,900 cases of crime against women were registered in 2021, 3,800 in 2022, and around 4,100 in 2023 in Jammu and Kashmir. A significant 121% surge in the 2024–25 financial year was seen, with 1,979 cases of domestic violence registered. Nothing can change if we do not take action. It’s high time we join hands to arrest the routine of violence against daughters-in-law and reverse this runaway criminal offence.
The society has become more accepting towards domestic violence against daughters-in-law or their husbands or both in most cases, with 95% older adults feeling comfortable living separately or with one son and his wife as an option, largely due to brittle financial stability and a craving for independence.
Many older adults are financially independent and no longer feel the need to stay in a joint family, leading to a trend where young couples are thrown out of the house or provided shelter only after a horrible fight. The in-laws often manufacture lies to justify verbal and physical abuse, depriving the couple of a roof over their heads and their constitutional right to live with dignity and comfort. The young mother mentioned earlier faced similar agony, and her husband’s middle-aged parents, who are living separately, sided with the younger son and his wife, thrashing the daughter-in-law and son on the spot.
This trend can be attributed to lax implementation of the law and the cultural trend, which often sides with property owners, only to deprive the young couple of housing rights and the right to property. Public silence and indifference exacerbate the situation, leaving thousands of sons and their wives languishing in distress, depression, and helplessness. ( No property, no roof, no rights for decades).
Domestic violence is widely prevalent but remains invisible in the public domain, with women being subjected to cruelty by their husbands or in-laws in various ways. The main reasons remain overt or covert demands for dowry, a wife’s opposition to her husband’s disloyalty, and the bad looks of a woman, or simply exercising her freedom of speech.
A daughter-in-law is expected to follow orders without question, and if she resists, she is punished verbally and physically. The statistics show the volume of crime, but the impact on a woman’s personality and psyche is hard to quantify.
It is an acknowledged fact that women received better treatment in ancient times, whereas their status deteriorated significantly in medieval times. However, the modern era has witnessed a considerable improvement in their position, with women now actively participating in various fields, including administration, healthcare, and politics.
In India, under the leadership of Prime Minister Narendra Modi, the national government has implemented notable reforms aimed at transforming the status of women. The abrogation of Triple Talaq for Muslim women is a case in point. Similarly, the ‘Beti Bachao, Beti Padhao’ welfare scheme has yielded substantial success nationwide. Furthermore, the recent introduction of the Women’s Reservation Bill in parliament underscores the government’s commitment to empowering women.
In our society, women are socialised to accept suffering and are not empowered to stand up for themselves. What hurts more is that they do not leave their matrimonial home due to the fear of the consequences for their children and the parental family. Legal grounds for this treatment are claims of property ownership, zero conviction rates, and wider social sanction.
The non-reporting of crimes is the main reason for the high crime rate. It’s hoped that cases will be filed with the police regarding the ill-treatment of daughters-in-law by their in-laws. Regrettably, numerous fathers– including those drawing government salary/pension– exploit the property ownership provision to perpetuate psychological abuse against any particular son and daughter-in-law daily, often with extreme cruelty, and without fear of legal or moral reprisal.
In support of the noble cause of preventing such domestic abuse against women/sons, it is essential to acknowledge that injustice anywhere constitutes injustice everywhere. The law enforcement mechanism’s partiality emboldens abusive parents, whilst married sons are unfairly prejudged without being heard.
(The Author is a teacher by profession and RK columnist. Feedback: sheikhshabir518@gmail.com)