Sometimes after a tiresome journey, we feel privileged and prefer to remain cocooned in self deception that life is going to be smooth now. We work hard; take pains for making our future bright and better. The more we are independent and indomitable in life, the more we become self reliant. We believe that the best time has come. We think and feel as if we have reached the zenith of life and this is the time we wish to enjoy our stay and status. Everything that happens in life cannot be precisely reasoned out and gauged but given our faith, we trust and leave our concerns to the Almighty. Life is itself a mystery and most unpredictable. Even when exercising greater caution in dealing with the situations, things still go out of control. Least we can imagine what destiny has stored for us and flash of seconds can turn the life upside down. When calamity falls upon a person, can sometimes leave him with no choice but to gather the courage, stand firm and be determined to face and fight back the challenges. Courage may be the only option to accept the God's decree but what matters is that still there are so many meaningful things which one can cherish and remain grateful for.
Not everyone is so strong to set an example and be an extraordinary. Some are too weak to take head on anything which tries to knock them down and easily give up and play victim card for seeking attention and sympathies. They cry and complaint unnecessarily even when the issue or incident is trivial. They never miss a chance to seed and spread negativety.There comes a time when others are fed up by their drama and leave them on their own. They stop paying them attention and keep a distance to stay away from their influence. And finally such persons suffer by their own approach, apathy and Sadistic delight.
You might have heard it many times that there was a man walking down the street, wishing to have good pair of shoes than he saw a handicap having no feet but with smiling face, radiating beauty of grace and gratitude. It was lesson for him to be thankful for that he could stand and walk on his own feet. How often we see many people who are well off in health and wealth but incessantly grump and grouse about minor fall or failure. They never remain serene and satisfied. There is no end to their greed and are never thankful for their blessed life.
Our true selves are in fact revealed when the setbacks and surprises of life storm upon us. They can shatter us but it depends on us how we remain composed to come out of the prison of self defeat and denial. The way we respond determines our worth. We can either make it magnificent or miserable for us and for others as well. We can either cheer or choke depending on our faith and upbringing. We can face life either as a warrior or a worrier.
No protection or precaution can save us when it has to happen because it happens only by the Will of Allah (SWT) to test us with trails and turbulations.One can either choose to be a crying baby or brave heart to face the circumstances. As a matter of fact we can find only few courageous people who leave their indelible mark and memory. They hitch their wagons to a star.
I could recollect that day when one of my friends topped CET 1999.We had a very limited circle of friends and everyone was a gem of a person. Another friend whom we used to call 'Brad Patt’ on our group was sweetheart to all of us. Luckily he also made it to the engineering college. Like all others, he also wished and worked hard to be the source of strength for his family. After graduating he planned a weekend getaway with his cousins to visit the family orchid where while dangling from a branch of an apple tree he had a tragic fall that broke his spine terribly. The accident handicapped him for the rest of life. The pathetic period of twelve years has already passed which is a coon's age. I cried tears of blood when he wrote to me that the incident has crippled and confined him to the bed as a quadriplegic handicap; the condition when only head and neck are functional but rest of the body becomes paralyzed. Its heart wrenching to know that he can only uses his tongue tip to type on the Smartphone so as to be in touch with his people. I have never heard and seen him complaining about his severe condition, infact his attitude towards life has altogether changed. He has not thrown himself haphazardly on the bed like a broken doll but remained calm and composed. He has been cheerful and classy all these years. He is not clouded and cracked by his adverse situation. Contrary to his condition, he has put on a brave face and kept smiling without carrying any baggage of complaints and concerns. His family has remained sweet and strong for him. There is no palpable fear seen in his eyes. He has peacefully and purposefully surrendered himself to the greater plans of Almighty. Neither he has given up on his Creator's mercy nor has he stopped praising his gratitude for Him. He still flashes those bubbly smiles to radiate his inner beauty. It is so heart touching when he says that the accident has got him closer to the Almighty and considers himself lucky person to face this ordeal. People like him are the great source of inspiration for those who are bearing up so courageously in such extreme situations
It was late in the night when I received a call from my friend who is a renowned Onco-Surgeon of the valley to share the detailed report about one Thyroid cancer patient' Afifa (Name Changed) whom I recommended and referred to him. She is just 27 years and happens to be the best friend and batch mate of my sister at Kashmir University. She was the 12th class topper who unfortunately lost her mother in the same year. She again topped in her graduation results and could easily crack the P. G entrance test in her stream. Post the sad demise of her mother, the responsibilities of the household fell on her shoulders as her elder sister got married and younger brother was too naive to keep the bits and pieces together. During her course studies, ‘Hallow Bone’ was detected in her ankle which was replaced by one of the Rib bones. This critical surgery kept her bed ridden for 6 months. Despite this seriousness and set back, she passed her all exams with flying colors. Sadly, the flood of 2014 devastated her humble abode as well. Only after few months another catastrophe fell upon them when Afifa felt strange irritation and dryness in her throat which on medical examinations and investigations confirmed she is suffering from thyroid cancer. Her nuclear family was shocked and shattered. They couldn't get in terms to accept and face the reality but Afifa is facing and fighting it like a warrior. She has not stopped attempting and doing big things in her life. She is the source of abundant joy and inspiration for everyone. Yes, she is managing everything on her own without unnecessarily relying upon anyone. She has got the daring and doesn't fear to visit Skims all alone for the chemotherapy sessions and arranging the appointments with the specialists for her treatment. She does everything with a grace. I have hardly found her sobbing out of grief and gloom. She might be alone but she has respectfully stood out from the crowd.
In year 1996, a good friend of mine was riding a bike on eidgah road when he met an accident. He was on a way to Lal Chowk to drop a person who was pillion riding and requested him for a lift to attend some urgent work. The said person hardly had any scratch marks but Shahid was badly injured. The impact of accident was such that it paralyzed his limbs and from that moment he could never walk again on his feet. Due to this tragedy everything changed for him but his family stood by him. His younger brother became his shield and support. Together they successfully managed the operations of their family business and also expanded it. Last month, I visited his shop and was more than happy to see him directing his salesmen to attend the customers. I was delighted to see his candid salesmanship, customer service, energy and enthusiasm. He often smiles and says that he is not just selling toys but becoming part of their sweet childhood memories. He has not been constrained by any disability and disappointment. It is inspiring to see him independent and living with a courageous spirit. He has found his path and purpose.
Sometimes disasters and disabilities might keep a person confined at a one place and if one survives, either he wishes to live a smooth life aiming at his own well-being or else he desires to die due to the fear of becoming burden on others but the story of renowned KAS officer of the valley Mr. Riyaz Ahmad Wani is extraordinary and epic. He has not only proved himself but also touched thousands of lives. In 1981, a horrible incident took place in his life when he was just four year old and got in contact with live high voltage wires. Somehow doctors could save him but his arms had to be amputeed.Imagine the condition of such a small kid who had to struggle with day to day compulsory activities like cleaning, clothing, eating and writing etc.When good people are around, one is not bothered about any situation. Due to the support of his family and friends, he could cope up with the limitations and didn't imprison himself in them. Somehow he learnt and practiced to write with his toe and adjusted to do all other work in his own way. All through his life he has been a go getter. He is an ardent sports person who likes trekking, swimming and football. Playing football is not as easy task even for 100 % fit and healthy player but Mr.Wani is the class apart who had played in North Zone Nationals for the Kashmir University at Aligarh, UP. He has done MBA from the Business School of Kashmir University. He was among the 28 successful candidates from the Kashmir Valley who qualified KAS 2004 in which around 40, 000 odd candidates appeared. Currently he is working as an Assistant Commissioner in Revenue Dept known for his exemplary work commitments. He feels privileged that his position has given him a power to work for the greater good and welfare of the society. This is what matters at the end, Whether one is having a lot or a little and if he can make a positive difference in someone's life, indeed he can done a great service.
It's not an easy task to accept the life when it takes such an ugly turn unless we don't possess that inner strength which guides us to the higher spiritual levels to understand the reason behind every test and trouble which we come across. What better than this when we rely on our holy book in which Allah (SWT) has assured that the solution to any problem by which we are tested is patience and prayers. When our beloved Prophets (AS) were severely tested than who we are before Him to challenge what He has destined for us or feel like distracted and disabled. He is there to take care of our fears and affairs.
Grace and gratitude is something which believers should maintain amid storms and set backs of life. It is this trait which sets them apart. The more they are determined to bear with the unpleasant circumstances the more their status will be exalted before their Lord. Only those who understand and believe in the plans of Allah (SWT) can come out of their discomfort zones because they know He works best for those who have faith in Him. He is by their side to provide them strength to face any calamity and consequences. They are the ones who fulfill His obligations and obedience without any fear and forebodings. And they strongly believe, these trials and tribulations are actually meant to help them in pushing the limits so as to find their spiritual path and purpose.
(The author is from Gasiyar, zadibal)