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How to deal with people if you are hypersensitive

Everything has changed across the world for everyone in so many ways. Being a highly sensitive person means you are more likely to feel things deeply, whether those things are positive or negative. While the highs can be joyous, the lows can present chall

Post by on Thursday, May 27, 2021

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Everything has changed across the world for everyone in so many ways. Being a highly sensitive person means you are more likely to feel things deeply, whether those things are positive or negative. While the highs can be joyous, the lows can present challenges that can affect your stress levels, relationships, and ability to cope. Make a plan for how you will manage your feelings in difficult situations to ensure that you don't become overwhelmed. Highly sensitive persons are emotional sponges who absorb other peoples’ stress into their bodies. 

Here are some things you can try so that this doesn’t consume you. One of the most practical ways to cope with shocking events is to limit your time scrolling social media and watching the news.

• When you are a highly sensitive person, it is difficult to know if, what you are feeling belongs to you, or someone else. So at that moment, naming the feeling you are experiencing can help you realize what feelings belong to you and which feelings might belong to someone else.

• Say you notice yourself absorbing the energy of those around you, so you must make an effort to ground yourself back to the present moment. Focus on a specific object nearby or name the things that are around you. Take some deep breaths and when your focus goes on the experience rather than the feeling, it is easier to keep the things you may feel from around you, separate from you. The more you can be fully present at the moment, the less likely you are to take on the negative emotions of others.

• Self-awareness is important when you are a highly sensitive person. So, you must acknowledge your need for alone time and spend time with your own emotions. When you are more aware of your feelings then it becomes easier to tell when you are picking up on someone else’s energy. Doing this will help you acknowledge emotions that do not belong to you, without absorbing them.

• There are also a few techniques one of which includes visualizing a glass wall between yourself and the other person which allows you to see the other person’s emotions but they can’t penetrate the wall. You must imagine that when they hit the wall, they bounce back to the other person, and are not absorbed by you. This technique can work in large crowds as well where you can just picture yourself surrounded by a glass wall as you move through the crowd.

• When speaking to somebody, instead of taking on their bad mood, you can ask them questions about what they are going through. Gaining a deeper understanding of what the other person is experiencing and why, can keep your feelings separate, no matter how highly sensitive you may be.

• You need to have strong boundaries since it is natural for you to understand and empathize with others and that’s why you might easily become a dumping ground for their negative emotions. So, it is important that you know yourself and what you are and aren’t able to handle. You might need more alone time than others to feel energized. Certain people and situations might be particularly draining for you and you may have to limit your exposure to those situations so it doesn’t consistently drain your energy.

• Even if you incorporate all of the above, if you are naturally sensitive to the emotions of others, there will be times when you will absorb them. When this happens, you can use another visualization technique to keep from becoming overwhelmed. For this, you simply can picture leaves floating down a stream. Picture yourself writing down the feeling you have absorbed onto a leaf. As the leaf flows down the stream and out of sight, the feeling goes with it, and you are left with the calmness of the flowing water. Try this the next time you pick up on someone else’s emotions and see if it is helpful.

• When negativity strikes, immediately focus on your breath for a few minutes. Slowly and deeply, inhale and exhale to expel the uncomfortable energy. As you breathe, I suggest firmly repeating aloud this mantra three times in a tone that conveys what you mean what you’re saying: Return to sender, return to sender, return to sender. The power of your voice can command the discomfort out of your body. Also, while saying this mantra, you can specifically breathe toxic energy out of your lumbar spine in your lower back. Visualize the discomfort exiting through these spaces in your spine. Declare “I release you” as it leaves your body and blends with the giant energy matrix of life.

• A quick way to dissolve stress and empathic pains are to immerse yourself in water. Empaths love water! You might want to add a little lavender essential oil to your bath—it is calming after a long day. The perfect empath getaway is soaking in natural mineral springs that purify all that ails you.

 • Empaths need to be alone, an ideal opportunity to reconnect with their force. On the off chance that you've gotten undesirable energy, make certain to set aside some alone effort to focus yourself. No noise, bright lights, phone calls, texts, emails, internet, television, or conversations. It’s sometimes important to just feel your energy without anyone else around. You are being your own dearest companion, which is an approach to sustain yourself.

• Empaths love nature and feel at ease there. Being in a fresh, clean, green environment or around water clears negativity. The Earth emanates healing. Try lying in a meadow and soaking up its energy in your entire body. Sense the nurturing medicine of the earth coming through your feet to ground you—a beautiful experience.

Dr. Bhavna Barmi , 
PhD,  MPhil ( NIMHANS) 
Child and Clinical Psychologist, Relationship Therapist,
NLP Practitioner and Life Coach, Fortis Escorts Heart Institute
Founder of Happiness Studio New Delhi

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