Breaking trust
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Breaking trust

Why trust binds us together, why relations break in its absence and what should we do to save our relations

Post by on Saturday, December 4, 2021

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We often come across instances where we find two persons, who once were the best friends have turned foes; a couple who were happily married have turned into two perfect strangers; an employee who once was praised by his employer is suddenly fired. One of the causes is the breaching trust. In fact I can say that many of us have become a victim of such dreadful experience sometimes in life. The younger generation is particularly prone to such occurrences.  Whenever such an incident happens to anyone of us, the result is we feel let down and lands in depression. The question now is: why trust binds us together, why relations break in its absence and what should we do to save our relations.  

Trust is like letting others know our feelings, emotions and reactions; having confidence in them that they will respect us and won't take any undue advantage. Or it may be like placing confidence in others so that they will be supportive. We all open ourselves to others be it our friends, parents, relatives etc to share our problems, concerns and fears. This is where trust finds its place in our respective lives. Just like a truss which is a sort of frame that provides support to a roof or a bridge, similarly as long as trust exists in any relation, it supports and nourishes it and prevents it from sinking.

A wealthy person leaves his entire riches into the hands of servant; two friends share their topmost secrets, just because of trust. Similarly a bigwig has his trust on his bodyguards, who carry the same arsenal as that of his assassin but the guards use them for the safety of their cardinal. This inner sense of acceptance we have of others with whom we are able to share secrets, knowing they are safe is trust.   Quite often we find ourselves in ambivalence when our heart or brain is unable to decide whether we should trust an outsider or not. This feeling always creeps in from the past bitter experience that we might have had where our trust has been broken. So being human we always try to avoid such circumstances again where we might hurt ourselves. But inspite of all the bitter experiences that one might have, we still find ourselves trusting again on a friend or a person."You may be deceived,’ Frank Crane said, ‘if you trust too much, but you will live in torment if you don't trust enough".

We repose our trust in our friends and other relations in one way or the other. In case of blood relations trust is inherent. But the other form of trust which builds up gradually with time between two persons who don't share a blood relation is where we are at risk. This trust exists between two friends. If this trust continues to exist in friendship, it is a blessing and we feel like on top of the world.

(Author is a Freelancer and Social Activist)