Being nice…really
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Being nice…really

The truth is that by being unable to say no, you are going to end up with a lot of unnecessary stress, extra work and a huge lack of respect from the people around you

Post by on Saturday, December 4, 2021

First slide
One of the main challenges of being a nice person is the inability to say no. It’s amazing how often people get themselves into all sorts of undesirable activities, simply because they are in the habit of saying yes to everything. The truth is that by being unable to say no, you are going to end up with a lot of unnecessary stress, extra work and a huge lack of respect from the people around you. Yes, you heard that right – a lack of respect…
Saying yes 
Often the underlying reason that we feel unable to say no is that we are driven by a need to have people like us… this creates the mistaken belief that people will like you if you say yes to them. In fact, this is quite a long way from the truth. They may like the fact that you say yes, but in reality they are using you because you are the easiest target if they have something that needs doing, or need someone to go somewhere with. It’s quite hard to accept that people are going to use you – this places you very firmly in the victim role. So, by always saying yes, you are choosing to be a victim and the easiest way to step out of that place is to begin to say no more often.
Easy to say no 
Saying no really doesn’t have to be so difficult. How many people in your life have said no to you? How many of those people have you subsequently stopped talking with because they said no? So how come it’s so hard for you? What’s the worst that can happen? To be honest, the worst that can happen is that people will start respecting you more because you are taking control of your life. Ok, a few people in your life might not like it when you stop bending over backwards for them… but actually, do you really want those people in your life anyway? So take it steady… there’s no need to go and say no to everyone about everything! Make sure you take it gently – particularly with people who you are very close with – they will conspire against you if you upset the apple cart too much! Start by saying no once; make it something you really don’t want to do! Gradually, you’ll find it’s really not that difficult to say no.
(From RK Archives)
 

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